The Ratliff Rules

A little less than a month ago, we started a new discipline structure. I wanted to wait to blog about it until I had a full cycle completed. There are those standard things that Joe and I struggle with when parenting Elle and Emme. We decided to write down 5 rules that our family feels strongly about and if you broke the rule the first time, then there was a consequence. We also wanted a way to praise them for the "everyday" things they should be doing without complaining.

So, we started a marble system. I will tell you all about it and it if you have any other suggestions that you think would work for our next cycle, please let me know.

Here is sweet Emme this morning, because today is the day they reached their "goal marble count."
Step 1. We bought jars and marbles.

Step 2, we determined the rules. The Ratliff Rules, such as Listen on the first time and no fighting are listed with pictures for them to understand.

Step 3, we listed out the Happy Face Jar rules -- if you complete any of these items, at any time, without complaining, then they automatically get a marble in their happy face jar. Items on this list include putting on seatbelt by themselves, without being asked. Getting dressed for school, gymnastics and church. Drinking a glass of water. and so on......

Step 4: The Reward -- if they got 100 marbles, or marbles to the line on the jar, then they get what ever toy they want.

Step 5: The consequence. Everytime they break a Ratliff Rule, the get a marble taken out of their happy face jar and into the frowny jar. It just delays the time/days until they get their toyHere is Elle's sad face showing you how many marbles they got in their frowny jar over these past couple of weeks.... I think we were pretty nice, probably should be alot more in there ;)

Here is the toy they picked out a month ago. We printed a picture and put it by the rules. When I pick them up from school today, we are going to get the toy for them. They are so excited.

Final Thoughts. I really do think this system is working. Are my girls perfect? No. Do they still fight? Yes. However, it has given me and Joe a mechanism of encouraging them and disciplining them that means something to them. All we really have to say is, "that just cost you a marble" and we make them go get the marble out of their jar and place it into the frowny jar. They are crying the whole time, but, they see the consequence of their action -- without Joe and I having to yell or spank or mess around with time out.

Are there times we have to still spank and implement time out, of course. However, I have seen this system work so well -- especially in the area of putting their seat belt on (this used to be such a fight) and washing their hair -- now they still hate washing their hair, but if they do it without complaining, they are able to go put a marble in the jar!